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Corrupt a wish


Sailor Jerry
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Granted. It's the Bates.

 

I wish I could decide whether I want to refinish my nugget or not.

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

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Granted. They are now called Factorys.

 

I wish playing through DA2 for a 4th time wasn't such a pain.

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

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granted now you die playing through it 

 

i wish that school taxes were lower

i'm a writer not a fighter.

à¸à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡Ê•â€¢Í¡á´¥â€¢Ê” à¸à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰ (that is supposed to look like a cute polar bear)

"you know what judge they say justice is blind i sure hope it ain't deaf." keeping the faith. Billy Joel

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Granted but now the school standards are that of an inner city Detroit high school.

 

I wish my cat would love me

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

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granted but now it loves you to much and you can't leave the house without it following you.

 

i wish i was an elephant.

i'm a writer not a fighter.

à¸à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡Ê•â€¢Í¡á´¥â€¢Ê” à¸à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰ (that is supposed to look like a cute polar bear)

"you know what judge they say justice is blind i sure hope it ain't deaf." keeping the faith. Billy Joel

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Granted but no one wants to talk about you when you're in the room.

 

I wish I was a better shot with handguns.

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

Az6EzuS.png

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granted but every gun you touch gets locked up 

 

i wish i had Ibm stocks

i'm a writer not a fighter.

à¸à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡Ê•â€¢Í¡á´¥â€¢Ê” à¸à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰ (that is supposed to look like a cute polar bear)

"you know what judge they say justice is blind i sure hope it ain't deaf." keeping the faith. Billy Joel

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Granted but every IBM facility gets hit with a ICBM and their stocks crash.

 

I wish I had a klondike bar

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Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

Az6EzuS.png

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granted but the klondike bar you get is expired and you get sick

 

i wish i worked at coke "a" cola again

i'm a writer not a fighter.

à¸à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡à¹‡Ê•â€¢Í¡á´¥â€¢Ê” à¸à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰à¹‰ (that is supposed to look like a cute polar bear)

"you know what judge they say justice is blind i sure hope it ain't deaf." keeping the faith. Billy Joel

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MY SIDES!!!! DUDE!!! OH MY GOD THIS IS GOLD!!!!

Granted but every IBM facility gets hit with a ICBM and their stocks crash.

 

 

Granted. You are their finest janitor. 

 

I wish I had a team of guys to be an improv border patrol. 

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Granted. They're all Mexicans with sympathies for illegals who they gladly let through for a nominal fee.

 

I wish I had a few extra hours before bed.

Granted. Your bed gets blown up by a plane. Hope you like scrap metal. Then they find the paper passport of the plane hijacker even though two titanium black boxes are destroyed. 

 

I wish I could be omniscient. 

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Granted but only in your dreams, and when you're awake you only remember bits and pieces, but never enough to figure out it's more than just dreams.

 

I wish steel cased ammo was less shit.

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

Az6EzuS.png

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Granted, but his puppeteer still doesn't.

 

I wish I could change specific events in my past.

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

Az6EzuS.png

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Granted......but you are now blind and your laptop has to use "text-to-speech" and the only voice you get is one that Steven Hawkins guy uses!

 

 

I wish I could get someone with a really cool/recognizable voice (like Morgan Freeman or that guy who does the A&E mystery shows and the Ron Burgundy movies) to narrate my life story!

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Granted you spend the rest of your life throwing everything away to achieve nothingness

 

I wish I was 21

Glory to the divine bush for he protects. When evil flies over head in his bombers, he will not see targets, only bushes. When his army of darkness comes to harm you, they shall get lost in the endless bush. The bush loves you, as you love the bush.

Az6EzuS.png

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Granted but then a war happened so you get conscripted and then died in an accident involving military grade tractor-glider.

I wish for a pancake

indonesia.jpg

King Bilal the Great Mediocre

The Average monarch of Billonesia

Wikia page (if you're into roleplay things).

We Tvtropes now. (down the rabbit hole!)

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