I've been using IRC for quite a few years now, and it has yet to "disappear" or"flustrate" me. As for the rest of your post it's a tad tough to understand but from what I gather you find it tough to join in the conversation? IRC, and most channels you would encounter, are public channels, just go there and say whatever you want, someone interested will reply, or if it's super crowded/busy, someone may query you.
If you really cant do that, make a channel and figure out a way to get people to join it.