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Squeegee last won the day on March 19

Squeegee had the most liked content!

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585 Politician


About Squeegee

  • Rank
    SK Sux

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  • Alliance Pip
    Seven Kingdoms
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  • Alliance Name
    Seven Kingdoms

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  1. Squeegee

    Stacy tells her story.

    Cool story and all, but does her mom have it goin on?
  2. Squeegee

    Careful, it's Soup!

    Why don’t you claim Yakuza as an extension of WTFark then? Make it a fair 3v3, by your logic at least. Your 3k infra cities are looking awfully tasty
  3. Squeegee

    Careful, it's Soup!

    May the Soup burn hotter than their nukes!
  4. Squeegee

    Remove war

    I promise you, you are not apart of the masses.
  5. Squeegee

    @everyone - It's true.

  6. Squeegee

    Just for appearances

    We can blame the UI of the game for one of the reasons people can't get into it however I think we all know that no one plays this game because of Smith.
  7. Squeegee

    Chaos sphere is the worse sphere

    As far as past SK leadership goes they could've gotten stuck with someone a lot worse... like Val
  8. Squeegee

    An Ocean Voyage

    Knockoff scroll 0/10
  9. Squeegee

    Chaos sphere is the worse sphere

    I'll take full blame for the edgy teenager part
  10. Squeegee

    The Stormlight at the End of the Tunnel

    SK did a scroll dummy
  11. Squeegee

    A Valid CB

    I have no idea who any of these people are.
  12. It was a dark night in the frigid North. The clouds from the coming storm blocked any moonlight from seeping in through the window and in the distance, thunder swelled. Squeegee laid in bed, huddled up under his multitude of fur blankets, as the wind howled outside. There was a flash of lightning and a clap of thunder and Squeegee woke with a start. He looked around his room, convinced he heard something moving in the shadows. Panicked, his gaze shot around the thick cut stone room. Was someone there or was it just a figment of his imagination? Another flash of lightning lit the room up once again, illuminating a figure standing at the edge of his bed. Squeegee froze. In front of him stood the Lost Wit, a former King’s Wit everyone assumed dead after she disappeared during a journey for self-discovery. A faint glow seemed to emanate from her. Squeegee reached for his sword, alarmed at the sudden intrusion. “Put your sword away,” Wit chastised. “I have not come to trifle with foolish behaviors.” She strode towards the window. As Squeegee rose to his feet to follow her, his head buzzed with questions. “Why have you returned now, Wit?” Squeegee asked, finally settling on one as he drew level with her. “Time is short and there is something you must see if the impending disaster is to be averted. You alone have the opportunity to prevent the destruction of all you can see. The true desolation is coming; Chaos awaits for its rebirth into this world,” Wit replied, her tone solemn. “Where is it that you require me to go?” Squeegee said, skeptical. “Oh, not far,” Wit said with a smirk. “In fact, you’re right where you need to be.” A deafening clap of thunder shook the castle and piercing light burned through the window. Squeegee watched as the stone roof peeled off into a thousand pieces before drifting upwards out of sight and the walls fell away to the side, to be slowly absorbed into a white sea of nothingness. As the North faded away, another scene soon took its place and Squeegee found himself in a field, alone. Wit was nowhere to be found. Squeegee could see the lights of a small village ahead, no more than a dozen houses all tightly packed together, smoke rising from their chimneys. Realizing this may be his best chance to figure out where he was, Squeegee set off towards civilization. He effortlessly jogged across the rolling fields and quickly found himself nearing the outskirts of the village. From here the plan was simple: establish his location, find out what had happened, and get something to eat. Once he reached the entrance to the village, Squeegee paused and looked around. He noticed one of the houses was noticeably larger than the rest and therefore appeared to be the most logical choice to knock at. Approaching the door, he reached out slowly and knocked softly, as the hour was late and he didn’t want to anger the inhabitants. After a few tantalising seconds, the door opened to reveal a man dressed in a rough shirt with muddied trousers and heavy boots. “Welcome, traveller, what can we do for you tonight?” he inquired. “I was hoping you might be able to tell me where I am. You see, I rather abruptly ended up here and I’m not exactly sure where ‘here’ is,” Squeegee explained sheepishly. “Well, you’re in the village of Cosham presently, about a week’s travel from the King’s castle in the North,” the villager said. “Why don’t you come inside and sit with us? The soup is hot and there’s plenty to go around.” “Sure…” Squeegee said, trailing off as a guttural, feral noise began emanating from outside the village. He took a step back to see where the sound was coming from. Down the street, huge seventeen foot tall monsters were streaming into the village. They were massive, round, furry creatures with huge front teeth. Squeegee watched as one of them reached down and devoured someone clean off the street. Villagers gathered with swords and spears and torches to try and fend them off but nothing seemed able to penetrate their skin. “Roqbots,” the man whispered. Squeegee looked at him. “Do you get them a lot here?” “More often than I’d like,” he replied. The villager gestured to a gap between two houses across the road and signaled that Squeegee should follow immediately. As they waited for a break in the droves of Roqbots streaming into the village before making their dash to cover the villager reached gingerly into his pocket and produced a small pouch. “Take this, I have a feeling that when the time comes you will be able to make better use of them than I,” the villager whispered as he handed the pouch over. Inside the pouch lay a handful of the largest gemstones Squeegee had ever seen, illuminated with a glow akin to pure moonlight. Looking at the gemstones further, Squeegee recalled the tales that the Lost Wit had told him about soldiers who could fly and conjure weapons from air. Just tales, he had told himself. The gap they had been waiting for presented itself, a quick glance between them confirmed that this was their one opportunity. They bolted from their hiding place, keeping low to avoid being spotted. Just as they reached the gap, a feral cry came from behind them. A Roqbot vaulted over the house and began to close in on them. Its shadow cut a truly imposing shape against the light of the houses and the moon. Forced into a corner with no way to escape, Squeegee stepped forwards, shoving the villager behind him in a futile attempt to protect him. The Roqbot lurched forwards, its claws slicing effortlessly through Squeegee’s left arm, nearly severing it from his body. With no other options remaining, Squeegee resolved to charge the beast in the hopes that the villager who had been so kind to him might have time to escape. As he charged, his body felt weightless. Puzzled, Squeegee glanced down at his hands and feet to see a glow emanating from them. Similarly, the wound on his arm had begun to heal at a remarkable rate. ‘Could it be that the tales of stormlight were actually true?’ he pondered as he pressed forward with renewed vigor. Instinctively, he threw his body into the creature with a motion and force he could never have dreamed of. The Roqbot recoiled, giving him time to once again throw his body into its chest. With a deafening crunch, his shoulder slammed into the creature, crushing its bones. The creature fell, its lifeless corpse laying at his feet, twitching as its blood drained into the ground around him. The village scene slowly melted away and Squeegee found himself in his room once again, hands still glowing faintly. He looked up to see Wit standing there again. “Well?” she asked, expectant. Squeegee looked down at his still glowing hands and replied, “I can see they were more than just stories after all.” Tl;dr Squeegee has been Stormlightened and pledges his life to following the ideals of Knights Radiant. As such, Seven Kingdoms will be known as The Knights Radiant from here on out and all copies of G.R.R. novels have been lost in a mysterious wildfire explosion.
  13. Squeegee

    The Soup is Hot

    I preferred the Hobo Express.
  14. Squeegee

    Nobody expects the Smothquisition

    Obligatory two weeks.
  15. Squeegee

    Extortion Distortion Whats Their Fortune?

    It’s current year dawg we’re all about clean renewable energy.

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