Leonard J Crabs
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Posts posted by Leonard J Crabs
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This is a message from the hospital known as aNiMaLz. I am Leonard J. Crabs Esq., AKA KrisWolfe, AKA the best Wolfe in Orbis, AKA The Wolfe of Orbis Street.
If anyone is not in the know, I am the Lard Commandante of Green Protection Agency, AKA the Economic Director, AKA the Overlord of the Breadline, AKA the Communist Dictator of who gets their needs filled.
I am here to speak on behalf of the Green Protection Agency today. This is a declaration of bankruptcy.
While a lawyer and a CPA in real life, I unfortunately forgot to carry some 1’s in my calculations. These things happen, I am only human, don’t sue me (HAHA). I should’ve used Excel spreadsheet, I apologize, but I had a bunch of napkins that I never use and apparently napkin math is used for extremely important decisions around these parts.
I first discovered the problem after I had taken out massive loans and somehow the money went DOWN the next week. It was very troubling. I asked my friend Blutarch to take a look but he, “finger quotes” said that capitalism is the death of the poor.
Even though we had received a bunch of funds, somehow we were in the red, after all our ill-gotten gains, our raid gains, our passive income, all the baseball gains, and our gym gains.
With a heavy heart, I, personally, and corporately, and communistically, speak for aNiMaLz and for Green Protection Agency, when I declare bankruptcy and default on the following loans:
tCW / Sphinx: $7,000,000,000
Rose: $5,000,000,000
Syndicate: $3,000,000,000
Afrika Korps: $600,000,000
Some dude named Parrish: $125,000,000
We also realized that, unfortunately, the receiving of BK’s and GoG’s bank and debt forced upon us by opposing force (everyone), we believe this is in violation of white peace since we had received reps and not nothing, and therefore they are in violation of white peace.
*Puts up feet on worn wood desk in front of him, pulls out a $5 cigar from 7-Eleven and lights it*
Now I know you have a bunch of questions, so I will answer a few before I kick you all out of my apartment office.
You, from the back, the hot lady in the red dress.
“Uh, yes. So, let me get this straight. You took out a bunch of loans and then declared bankruptcy. Isn’t that called stealing?”
-Oh, no, no, no. This is called Capitalism and the Free Market.
Next question. The doofus with the glasses.
“You can’t just say you’re filing bankruptcy”
-I didn’t say it, I declared it.
Aight, short stubby bald dude in the back.
“Wait, how does this violate the white peace again?”
-Doesn’t matter, I never recognized any of you as having the brain capacity to be diplomats anyways. CBs are stupid.
Last question, tall scruffy fella in the front.
Aren’t you afraid of getting cease and desist letters from these banks you’ve scammed?
-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *wheeze*
*Waves off all new questions, pours gasoline on the desk and floor as gasps erupt from the journalists. Lights desk on fire with cigar*
Let’s get this party started.
We stand with NPO and all of our allies.
/Signed/
KrisWolfe, Lard Commandante of Green Protection Agency
Dancemasterlee, fartman and prophet of neutrality
Archibald, Newbie Wrangler, Fire Starter, Fire Extinguisher, and Sleepy Boy
Penultimo, Second in Command to the mighty and magnificent El Presidente!
Do Not Fear Jazz, some shark
Marx, the communist guy
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That's such a perfect background picture to completely capture the current situation.
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4 minutes ago, Jeric said:
Do y'all need a copy of the original DoN? Pretty sure I still have it somewhere. Like on the original forums or something.
We have no idea what you're talking about.
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1 minute ago, Luryy said:
good luck? eat dongs
we love dongs, as long as they were neither raided illegally or earned through hard work
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6 minutes ago, Christensen said:
You want alliances to "formally recognize" your neutrality?
yes
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yes the only thing that could defeat us was an admin stepping in for your side
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that's not how you recognize GPA
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how did you get 1000 munitions in the bank? asking for a friend
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were you gonna post the proof of the debt or nah?
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guess I should get back to working on my aNiMaLz DoE
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The best part of this thread is all the super salty Coalition A members complaining in a thread that has nothing to do with them.
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Goons would like to take the time to thank The House for this quick and feisty ending of hostilities. It was a bloody affair, and the 500 coal will be placed in a museum for all newbies to gawk and awe at
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1 minute ago, Pasky Darkfire said:
Robin Hood Burns the Stew because he's day dreaming about Maid Marian. Little John was hanging laundry.
Gawd. Talking about never watching it. Regardless. You're probably right about the analogy.I've been owned
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3 hours ago, Charles the Tyrant said:
Burnt stew? What a wonderful metaphor. I imagine you came up with that one all by yourself?
I pity your childhood if you didn't enjoy this beautiful gem
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27 minutes ago, Charles the Tyrant said:
Are you the Sheriff of Nottingham?
imagine thinking Minesome was Robin Hood, and not the burnt stew Little John makes
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This is absolutely abhorrant. Why would anyone be apart of Coalition B is beyond me.
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On 1/25/2020 at 7:38 AM, Bjorn Ironside said:
Never understood this need or want for a catch up mechanic, Why should someone who has played 300 days be the same size as someone who has played 1500 days?
Oh did you not read the text that you quoted?
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I think baseball fills the "catch up" mechanic that every multiplayer game requires or it will die. New players need to be able to catch up to the players that have been around for 5 years, or there's really no reason for new players to play this game over another.
That said, this mechanic is available to everyone, not just new players, and it's always been here.
Most baseballers don't cap out, it's usually around 5 mil. If we could drop the max games to 200 games, and cap it at 5 mil, it would make it alot more accessible for everyone.
Or have one game per turn, and have the winning split between both players evenly.
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3 minutes ago, Alex said:
Furthermore, now that we are looking at the data, it seems obvious that at least 3 nations have abused baseball using bots.
In the 1,998 days the game has existed, these nations have each played around 1,000,000 games of baseball. That's, on average, ~500 games / day (a lot to do manually.) Realistically, they did not play 500 everyday, and must have had periods of playing more games at one time.
But, these baseball teams haven't been around since the beginning of the game. The top revenue generating team (~$14.5 trillion in-game) has only been around for 947 days. That's averaging 1,040 games per day. Has someone really dedicated hours every day for the past 3 years to playing baseball?
No, not a mistake, and yes, both can be true (Blighty and Who Me have generated enourmous amounts of money playing baseball and very likely ran bots. Also birdsonwheels5, although they got less money out of it. See my above post.)
are the red strike throughs the ones that got banned for botting?
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5 minutes ago, Alex said:
Well, in my opinion, this seems to be more of a political issue than anything. Some alliances rely on baseball to be competitive, and some don't, and I think this data shows how impactful baseball can be on gameplay.
3 alliances (NPO, GPWC, GOONS) have generated ~$24 trillion in-game currency. For reference, there is currently only ~$650 billion in-game. To be clear, those 3 alliances have generated an amount of money that is 37x the total amount of money currently in the game.
you mean 24 billion. That graph shows billions.
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10 hours ago, Sir Scarfalot said:
Actually, I did. NPO blitzed their own allies plenty of times this war, directly attacked their allies in T$, you broke your NAP with TLE and with TI. That's four right there.
There's more than even that, so yes, you're constant pactbreakers.
uh no, we did not break our NAP with TLE. They blitzed us.
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you've said we've done it constantly, name three times.
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14 minutes ago, Sir Scarfalot said:
NPO broke a hell of a lot more than that on multiple occasions, slotting and beiging their own allies this war alone. You're also neglecting the fact that Goons attacked TLE, not the other way around, TI never actually broke their pact which means that you actively did, undercutting your point entirely. I'm not familiar with the specifics regarding #1 or #3 so I'll not comment on those, but there's zero way around the fact that NPO, Goons and BK 100% violated their active alliance with T$.
Thus, I'd say that pacts no longer have validity. Anyone is free game for anyone else, since that is the environment IQ has deliberately created with their bad faith agreements with basically everyone. It's entirely on you that we're at this point.
and you literally can't name three times they've broken NAPs
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1 hour ago, Sir Scarfalot said:
I really don't see any point in you trying to make any promises at this juncture, they mean less than nothing. I have every confidence that you will violate any or all NAPs for no reason, as you and yours have done, constantly.
name three
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[DoB] A declaration from Green Protection Agency
in Alliance Affairs
Posted
this is the best post I've ever seen you post Buor.