United Hoods-The Empire of Moonlit Sakura MDoAP

[Creed]

In the penthouse, Creed is hanging out with Johann while he manages the alliance military statistics, all while making another edition of “The Word on The Street”. He scrolls through the ground troops, airforce, and ships, then stops at missiles.

 

“Creed?” Johann says as he looks at his tablet, very concerned.

 

“What’s up, warchief (Haha WoW reference)?” Creed responds as he lays upside down on the couch eating squid sashimi (It’s really good actually).

 

“Uh...why do you have so many missiles?” Johann holds up a chart of the amount of alliance’s missiles, with Creed’s bar being much higher than anyone else’s. By like, a lot. Creed looks at the chart a bit then at Johann...then back at the chart again….then Johann. “Listen, you know my alignment is ‘Chaotic Good’ right?”

 

“Why do you have so many? What is your income for that matter?”

 

“About 1.7 Mil a day.”

 

“Right now?”

 

“Right now.”

 

“...how.”

 

“My people love me, dude. My infrastructure is like, the greatest, no disease, no crime. It’s like a haven. Although, I do need to figure out how to raise the minimum wage…$4.55 is very meager compared to the US. Then again, our markets are a bit different, so everything is affordable.”

 

“But why do you need them? You haven’t had a war in a while.”

 

“I am a man of peace.”

 

“You have enough missiles to bomb half of a state.”

 

“.....I am a man of peace.”

 

The phone rings on the same table as Johann. He reaches for it, but Creed jumps up from the couch and snatches it. He picks up with, “Hello, United Hoods, need a gangbang or a trade, we can either sell you goods or run that fade.” On the other end is a bit of silence then a “Hello. Who am I speaking to?”

 

“You are speaking to only the best person in the alliance. The one and only Creed Mallory.”

 

“I see. I would like to speak to your Foreign Relations leaders.”

 

“You’re speaking to one!”

 

“...is there anyone else?”

 

“Well, Grimes is out doin whatever Aussies do. One time she left her blue-ringed octopus in the bathtub. Let me tell you, that wasn't fun. Anyways, so, you’re stuck with me.”

 

“Okay, well, my name is Ukunaka Sahoni, and I’m the Emperor of The Empire of Moonlit Sakura.”

 

“The Empire of what-now?”

 

“Moonlit Sakura.”

 

“Moonlit Sakura?”

 

Johann overhears then quickly takes the phone and puts it on speaker and sets it down on the table.

 

“We have interest in your alliance and would like to work together. A sort of treaty.”

 

“What kinda treaty?”

 

“Well, I was thinking of a sort of mutual defense.”

 

“Hmm, a mutual defense, never had one of those before. What do they do?”

 

“It ensures that both parties help each other out when attacked.”

 

“So like, if United Hoods was to get attacked, you guys come and help?”

 

“That is correct.”

 

“Hmm, but how can I trust ya’ll. I don’t even know what you look like.”

 

That’s when the doorbell rings. “Hold on, someone’s at the door,” Creed says as he travels all the way to the front entrance, with Johann following. He opens the door and sees multiple people standing there, with one holding a phone. “Hello, United Hoods, need a-” Johann covers Creed’s mouth and says, “That’s Moonlit, green.”

 

Creed says through muffles, “Fmuunrit? Auh. Hoi zhudes. (Moonlit? Oh. Hi dudes)” Johann takes his hand off of Creed’s mouth and he gives a sharp inhale. “Well, I dunno how you found where we are, but welcome.”

 

“Your house has a sign saying ‘United Hoods’ with your flag on a flag pole in the front of the yard too,” Ukunaka says. Creed goes outside and sees the comically large, bright neon sign that says, “United Hoods Headquarters”.

 

“Who put that there?” Creed says in an annoyed tone.

 

“You did,” Johann replies.

 

“I did? Oh. I mean pfft of course I did. I’m an intellectual, I just...get lost...sometimes.”

 

“You called us saying you got lost...in the Salt Lake. In.”

 

“That was one time.”

 

“That was five times.”

 

“That was one plus four times.”

 

“That’s...five.”

 

“No I said that.”

 

Johann sighs and turns to the party of visitors, “Sorry, Emperor Ukunaka. Anyways, a mutual defense?”

 

“Yes. I think it would be in both of our best interests.”

 

“I mean I’m down for it.”

 

“WAIT A MINUTE,” Creed shouts with a serious tone. “....I get the name now.”

 

Johann looks at Creed than at Ukunaka. “He’s not always like this, I swear”

 

“I see,” Ukunaka says.

 

Creed checks out the rest of the members and stops at a woman with armor. “You are?”

 

The woman answers, “I’m Commander Seshat of the Celestial Armada.”

 

“Armada, like the melee dude?”

 

“No, Armada as in a fleet of warships.”

 

“Your warships have feet? Woah.”

 

“No. Fleet. With an L.”

 

“Oh I don’t take those.”

 

Seshat gives Creed a look that sends a chill down his spine. He retreats back behind Johann and whispers, “She’s a bit scary.”

 

“You can take him if you want,” Johann jokes.

 

“Uh no offense but NO. She’ll eat me.”

 

“That a bad thing?”

 

“Let’s just, get to writing down that treaty.”

 

United Hoods and The Empire of Moonlit Sakura are homies. Broskis, best friends, however you wanna call it. But it's a thing baby.

 

[Guest Epi]

700

 

Edited February 16, 2021 by Epi