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Edwardidk

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Status Updates posted by Edwardidk

  1. sp00ktober is alm0st 0ver

     

    reminder t0 sp00k y0ur friends

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  2. >mfw i call someones mom gey

    >mfw they say "no u"

    this is so sad alexa play despacito

     

    ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: Despacito

    ──────────────────────────────────

    ◄◄⠀▐▐ ⠀►►⠀⠀ ⠀ 1:17 / 3:48 ⠀ ───○ ?⠀ ᴴᴰ ⚙ ❐ ⊏⊐

  3. Rawr x3 nuzzles how are you pounces on you your Model V-2-34 38.8 L V12 Diesel engine is so warm OwO notices your cupola o3o someone's easily penetrated Loads Panzergranate 39 ~ murr~ hehehe knocks out your commander and loader you're so big :oooo fires into the driver compartment it doesn't stop penetrating ·///· rams you and shoots a Zis-30 your necky daddy likies (; nuzzles wuzzles I hope daddy really likes SturmGeschütz III Ausführung G: wiggles engine compartment and squirms I want to see your big daddy ammo racks~ wiggles turret I have a little itch o3o wags barrel can you please get my itch~ puts tracks on your frontal armor nyea~ its a 75 mm Kampfwagenkanone 40 itch rubs your frontal armor can you help me pwease squirms pwetty pwease sad face I need to be punished runs tracks down your frontal armor and fires turret-mounted Maschinengewehr 34 lol like I need to be punished really good~ tracks onto your ammo racks as I lick my lips I'm getting thirsty. Can I go for the Panzer Badge breaks your tracks with MG 34 as I load HE my you smell so oily :v licks barrel mmmm~ so oily drools all over your 76-мм танковая пушка обр. 1940 г. Ф-34 your cannon breach I like fondles Radio Operator Gunner hehe puts muzzle break on driver hatch and inhales deeply oh god my frontal armor is 55 mm~ licks cupola punish me daddy~ nyea~ squirms more and wiggles Machinengewehr 34 I love your communist goodness bites KwK 75mm cannon breach please punish me nuzzles nyea~ blows off your barrel so good licks gun oil of your 76 mm tank gun M1940 F-34 salty goodness~ driver reverses and fires Hl.Gr. 38C mmmm~ laughs and blitzkriegs

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. 丂ħ̧i̧₣ɫ̵γ͘ ̶™
    3. Thalmor

      Thalmor

      @Honey Monster

      Shifty has posted NSFW content. He warrants a warning point immediately.

    4. Rimski

      Rimski

      Thalmor is still here. He warrants a warning point immediatly!

  4. Introducing... the Baked Shifty Stranger Fan Club!

     

    Now with 20% more salt, 200% more memes, and 100% garbage content.

    Join today!

     

  5. Seventy-four. Eight thousand two hundred and thirty-nine. Fifteen. Eight hundred and twenty-seven.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    If you thought this post was going somewhere, you'll be thoroughly disappointed.

    1. WISD0MTREE

      WISD0MTREE

      The numbers, Mason. What do they mean? 

  6. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

     

    What's the difference between a "slim chance" and a "fat chance"?

     

    If people from Poland are Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

    1. WISD0MTREE

      WISD0MTREE

      Wait, so... Since wise men and wise guys are opposites, then what is a wise tree? 

  7. Hello, my name is Moderator
    And I have a truth to tell
    What it's like to moderate
    And to have someone berate

    Of how unfair I must've been
    To grade his work and all
    And finally to give third place
    In HIS opinion--what a disgrace!

    "You have been so mean to me
    And so, with no adieu,
    I will tell the world of my
    Hard feelings towards you."

    He goes around and tells his story
    Way out, far and wide,
    Little understanding how I 
    Feel Inside.

    "What a disgrace, Mr. Moderator!
    Most certainly, what a disgrace, 
    To see you put me in third place
    ...Tut, tut, what a GRAVE disgrace!"

    Behold Mr. Moderator 
    As he stands his ground
    While mindless ones go to and fro
    And smear him till he frowns.

    Grave Mr. Moderator,
    With his face so dim,
    Longingly waits for no more disgrace
    Of mindless ones towards him. 

    Mis-ter Moderator, quiet as he could be
    Writes down his notes 
    And reveals his thoats (thoughts)
    Of what did really be (what REALLY happened)

    Of how Mr. John,
    The angry one,
    Has gotten his p's and q's mixed up 
    And how Mr. John had some fun
    And unknowingly, HAD messed up

    What did he mess up, indeed,
    How did he mess up indeed?
    He messed up in grammer, and spelling,
    And...manner of writing his words--INDEED!!

    Then without double checking,
    Mr. John in a rush,
    Sent his poem, wacky and...wookee
    To the Moderator for being judged

    Mr. Moderator, quite the commentator
    Looked LOUD and LONG at his poem--
    riddled with errors and full of atrife
    That he just had to grab a knife...

    With said knife, he clearly slashed 
    The WHOLE poem into the trash
    Bit by paper, white droplets did fall
    And landed in the land of...per-ishable fall (the trash basically)

    With trusty computer and keyboard in hand
    He began to type just as fast as he can--
    And tell that guy, full of pride
    That "hey....your poem's in the trash."

    Moderator proceeded to tell
    How the "work of art" did not bear well--
    With words misspelled all over the place...
    "...and grammar misplaced--oh, what a DISGRACE!!"

    "I told and I warned you,
    Before submitting a poem,
    You must check it and then...check it
    ..BEFORE I inspect it."

    "Therefore, I now decree
    That your poem is third place
    For you did not do your part
    In keeping the rules of this...race."

    Mr. John after getting the e-mail,
    Was filled to the end of his rope
    And so, lost hope and grabbed a rope
    And proceeded to choke himself. 

    ...The webcam was on, and Moderator saw
    What this man was about to do
    And this he said, (and we would say too),
    "Young man, get OUT of your stew. (You heard of people "stewing" over problems?)

    "You need to do better
    And when you do better
    I will look at your poem
    And say that it's better"

    "Then your poem I will inspect
    And your poem I won't reject
    So then you will get your reward
    ..and as for me, I won't get bored."

    But Mr. John, in a rage,
    Looked at the camera with disdain
    And turned it off as fast as he could
    And then suddenly, to his feet he stood

    ...He sat back down, and with his site,
    Entered many weblogs--cruel and full of spite
    Against Mr. Moderator--
    the commentator

    ...So this is my life as a moderator
    What a REALLY hard life it is
    Now you make sure, that you learn
    The ins and outs of it

    For when you become, as I am
    You begin to see and understand,
    What a hard life that we all lead...
    When you all become just like me  (a moderator)

  8. The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Vladamir Putin

      Vladamir Putin

      Don't drop the ribosome.

    3. Peter Quill
    4. Vladamir Putin

      Vladamir Putin

      Sorry, i only blow straight men, because i'm not gay.

  9. On point singing :D

  10. nag nag wc nag nag poke poke :^)

    1. Theodosius

      Theodosius

      Once again, I'm not colour blind. xD

  11. Only guy who could manage to declare on his own alliance...

     

    inb4 MDP activation.

    1. Thalmor

      Thalmor

      If we don't know what we're doing, then the enemy certainly won't know what we're doing.

  12. Wha... why are you still here? Well... cya...

     

    Shoo. You're scaring me.

     

    I'm flattered by your interest and impressed by your determination in reading this.

     

    But really. Go away. :|

    This is creepy.

     

    WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?

  13. Fred Meyer. What's on your list today?

  14. Secretly KGB, out to steal my memes. :o

  15. Need money for memes.

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