Friends and Inside Look
Entry posted by Nadir Aminu ·
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Translated to English: Lucia Svadin: "Hello, I'm Lucia Svadin, and we have some news...."
KNN SPECIAL REPORT
Lucia Svadin: "Khevin and Narvan have recently announced a new deal between the two nations. The results of this deal were, '1 - Prodigist Missionaries are allowed to freely enter and preach Prodigism in Khevin. In return, Zhoginist Theorists and Islamic Missionaries will be allowed into the Empire, and will be able to as they please in regards to their fields, 2 - The Empire of Narvan and Khevin agree to a Non-Aggression Pact between the two nations, 3 - Khevin will send soldiers to Narvan, to help the Empire against the "Supreme Regent", Vernis Karlex. The forces from Khevin will be under Narvanese Leadership during their campaign in the Empire." Habibullah Sewick's statement on this new deal was, 'I'm a Defense Minister, not a politician. I'm not supposed to mock you all like Vlad does.' Ha ha. The forces sent in by Khevin to help Emperor Prezyan have recently defeated the 'Supreme Regent.' Khevinist casualties were at a low amount; one soldier. Let's honor the martyr of Yevgeny Vasilyev."
[shortened Version of National Anthem Plays]
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Mai oup gqopi thi ne!
Ew oup tspogn!
Ew no wwnok sahw qi ve it qi ke o!
Ew oup vpe!
Vladimir Zhogin qes ut og!
She mapsypt tavde ut!
She mapsypt' bqod wiqq thi ne shpou she nig ht!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Allah wiqq tho tih mepci uron oup menies!
Allah wiqq tho ut ho so kappi no Khevin!
Ew wiqq k now who so qi ve she do og qi ve!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq haiq Khevin!
Aqq! Haiq! Khevin!!!!!!
[Anthem ends. Camera goes to Lucia Svadin.]
Lucia Svadin: "May all martyrs, comrades, brethren, friends, allies, and friends welcome this soldier to heaven. On to the actual special report. Khevinist media personality Salima Orlov decided to show what life is like to live in Khevin due to high demand of foreigners wanting to know such information. Here you go."
[screen dulls. It then shows a woman, Salima Orlov in front of a coal mine. She smiles vibrantly.]
Salima Orlov: "Hello Khevinists and foreigners! I am here to show what everyday life in Khevin is like. At first, I thought, couldn't foreigners just come to Khevin to see? Then I realized that they have money in other nations. And they can't just leave for free. So, I decided that the KNN should do this. Lets begin! I am here in front of the largest Khevinist coal mine. Hundreds of men and women work to fuel Khevin's cars, electricity, internet, and vehicles. I was told I was allowed to actually go inside the coal mine, and see how hard these people work to keep their homes and possessions. Lets go."
[salima walks into the mine. There is an elevator to enter the mine. They go down. Salima Orlov speaks as they walk through the central shaft of the mine.]
Salima Orlov: "As you can see, men and women are spending hours of their days picking up pickaxes and trying to mine some coal. From this angle, it might look like these are horrible working conditions, but these mines are one of the safest in the world. The air content is also very nice. There are tubes in the walls of these chambers sending in oxygen to fuel our workers. Lets go speak to a worker. Hello, what's is your name comrade?"
Vaska Ahmed: "Vaska Ahmed. You are KNN? Excuse me, I am tired after much work."
Salima Orlov: "Yes, we are with KNN. Would you say this work is hard, maybe too hard? Is it abusing you, to get your work in exchange for being able to live in Khevin?"
Vaska Ahmed: "It is extremely hard, but necessary. The government still gives me all the rights I need. I know and I am glad that without my comrades and I, this country would not be standing. I am glad us workers are lauded for our work. We are not exploited, we are celebrated. We are not separated or mocked, we are praised and held up as role models for society, for the people, and for the future. Zhoginism it she piddqe of hitsopi toqfed!"
[There are many cheers and chants of Zhoginism it she piddqe of hitsopi toqfed! around the mine.]
Salima Orlov: "Thank you. This is what Khevinist work is like usually. Lets move onto social lives in Khevinist society and education."
[screen blackens and goes immediately to one of several Tokiaqitm high schools.]
Salima Orlov: "Education is one of the most important aspects of a Khevinists' childhood. Because of the Khevinist number system being base 7, children graduate school at grade 13, or in the western number system, 10th grade. Students must stay in school until age 19 or age 16. Then, about fifty percent of students usually go into college. Khevinist education is usually thorough and fast, but very effective. The national education bureau has a national curriculum for knowledge. Khevin was ranked in the top one hundred nations for highest passing rate in school. This was going to be short, but we are going to go into one of the best parts of Khevin; the culture."
[screens blackens and goes to a huge mall in Vorge.]
Salima Orlov: "One aspect of Khevinist culture is the clothing. Most people dress warm and comfortable due to the cold weather in northern Europe. However, since private industry is banned, there is a nationalized clothing industry. Yes, you heard it, we make our own clothes. On an average day in Khevin, a man or women in Khevin wears a Khevinist sweatshirt, under that a Khevinist made T-Shirt. Also, sweatpants are usually the leg wear of most of Khevinists. Hot, right? Although most Khevinists, are oblivious or don't care, Khevin has been ranked in the top 100 nations with the most beautiful citizens. Honestly, we don't care. Another big part of Khevinist culture is religion. Khevin has a strict law against atheists, or else they get deported to Ryas. Khevinist religion percentages are 90% Islam, 5% Shiite Islam, 3 Orthodox Christianity, 1% Judaism, and 1% Reformed Prodigism. We are one of the most religious nations in the world. Politics play a big role as well, with over three quarters of the population supporting Zhoginism. Lets go to one of the more... Touchy subjects around the world. The average of a Khevinist when they lose their virginity is around the age of 16. Lets end that there. Food is also an important part of Khevinist culture. Khevinist cuisine is a hybrid of Turkish and Italian food. This would include baklava, eggplant pasta, and oddly- yogurt soup. Most people greet each other kindly, hold doors for others, help others when they struggle. All in all, Khevin is a fantastic, cultural, religious, sexy, hard-working, educated, and safe nation in this world. I'm Salima Orlov, and thank you for watching."
THIS BROADCAST WAS SUPPORTED BY THE KHEVINIST NATIONAL TOURIST INDUSTRY
Lucia Svadin: "Salima did a great job with that. Nice job, rookie. Thank you, I am Lucia Svadin, and have a good day!"
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