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The Pirate's Life - RNB

Dimitri Valko

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February 14th, 1999

 


Hello and welcome to RNB, thanks for tuning in, tonight. We have some exciting news about Valko's change in style, so stay tuned for it!

 


THE PIRATE'S LIFE

 


As some of you may know, President Dimitri Valko has turned to a life of sea-faring adventure. For those of you here after the show airs, looking on the internet, here's a portrait of the Captain, here!

 


Dimitri%20Valko%20Captain%20Closeup%20VX_zpsghhffzej.jpg


Portrait of Captain Dimitri Valko, February 1999.

 


He's really embracing the pirate's life, and he's having a tonne of fun doing so. He's taking mercenary contracts, looting abandoned cities, raiding the foolish, and by doing so, helping out all of his citizens! He's always been a great military leader, and now he's just using that to our advantage, and Ryas has been getting better and better with each day. The nation is flourishing! It's amazing!

 


ISLAMIC REPUBLIC OF KHEVIN JOINS PRAETERITUM

 


So, after RCI merged, our strongest ally, Khevin, joined the Alliance of Praeteritum, and seems to be doing well for now. Zhogin has stated that he wishes to be with his friends in Goand and Canada, and he has been. More news on the subject will be brought up when more is known. Khevin seems to be safe from raids at the moment, however that could change at any moment.

 


THE MERCENARY WARS

 


Valko's military has taken up an offer to raid a foolish and tyrannical leader, so he took on the contract. When the opposition surrendered, and the contract was closed early, he took half a million as reward. He also stormed another nation for the goal of getting Ryas enough money to build an Iron Dome, to defend against Missile, and thus protecting his civilians. Quite a noble cause for us, and his military is actually having fun doing these raids against large and vast cities on distant continents. "It's the most fun I've had in my life" states Ryasian General Andor Kozma. "It's simply the greatest feeling one can have, being out at sea, pillaging the wrong, and fighting for the right."

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AiOS

In a Red Castle poll of 1,013 Athretvarian citizens on the streets of Maria, 71% of the respondents had a favorable opinion of the dread pirate Captain Valko, calling him a maritime Robin Hood. While 19% had a negative opinion. Calling him... well... a pirate. 9% said they had no clue who Captain Valko was and didnt much care as long as his nefarious ships stay away from Athretvarian waters, and 1% of respondents said they thought Captain Valko was a brand of cheap Ryasian spice rum.

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Eric

Most Canadians think Captain Valko is a brand of cheap rum. Then everyone who knows him hates him a lot now because Canada thinks extremely low of Arrgh.

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